Today’s quote is a poem written by Kirstie Sagermark, a member of our San Diego/SoCal Endometriosis Support Group, and she gave me permission to share it with all of you today:
You are allowed to cry. Today was hard. You Tried. You lost your temper. You had fun. You were frustrated. You cringed. You did it anyway. Pain. Smiles. Laughs. Aches. Distractions. Pain. You had responsibilities. You prayed. You provided. You loved. You worked. You pulled through. You were exhausted. You did it anyway. You need time. You want peace. You feel sad. You are strong. You want answers. You need understanding. You Tried. Today was hard. You are allowed to cry.
Today was hard.
You are allowed to cry.
I love this. All of it.
Today I spent two hours updating my pain journal with all of the entries from late March. And I did…I cried. Just seeing how bad many of those days have been made me so grateful that I have a surgery coming up. And speaking of surgery, it’s been moved back up to May 13th!!
Let’s do this!
And it truly is okay to cry. If you ever need someone to talk to while you weep, I’m right here.
It’s Friday! Again. Already! How are all of you coping during times of isolation, shutdowns, and essential workers?
I had a conversation with my doctor today after receiving some blood tests back.
I’m mostly healthy. My bad cholesterol levels (LDLs) are a wee high, as are my FSH hormone and TFH (thyroid) levels. It also came back that my testosterone and estrogen levels were a bit low. As well as my B12 and Vitamin D levels.
It’s a bit of validation for my thought process: I’m at the very beginning stages of menopause. Bring it on!!!
I’ve got some recommendations for boosting my B12/D numbers, and dropping my thyroid hormone before we retest in three to six months. And I’ve started exercising like a crazy person the past few weeks due to being stuck inside. So we’ll see if that helps drop that bad cholesterol.
And…I’ve read from various studies that enjoying one 4-ounce glass of red or white wine each day can help with heart health.
So I’m sitting here on my couch, lounging in my workout clothes, finished my research, and am sipping on a cold glad of white wine. I’m seriously going to try to only have one. And to keep it to the 4-ounce limit.
All of this news, processing, and self-reflection leads me to today’s quote:
“Wine had to be grapes first. Diamonds had to be rocks first. Butterflies had to be caterpillars first. Rainbows had to be storms first.” ~Matshona Dhliwayo
We will transform and get through all of our woes.
I’ve been put on work furlough and have applied for unemployment. It’s still unknown if my May 13th excision surgery will remain on calendar or be postponed. And I’m going a little stir-crazy in the house, unable to leave except for “essential tasks.”
I totally forgot it was Friday until a few minutes ago! Ha!
I have to remind myself daily that finances will be okay, I’ll have my job back once this crisis is over, my husband will come home safe and sound, and by staying home I’m protecting myself and others.
And I’ve picked my sewing projects back up, cleaned the house like a madwoman, bought a treadmill, and am keeping my mind and body occupied.
Still, though, I’m stir-crazy and bored. Perhaps next week I will focus on researching and writing new blog entries!
May today’s quote inspire you to embrace those things we can no longer experience, at least for now:
“Freeze, freeze in the winter, if you really want to appreciate the summer! Walk, walk at the edge of the precipices, if you rightly want to learn the meaning of the safety! Switch the lights off, if you want to see the amazing beauty of the light!”