Feel Good Fridays

Thunderstorm clouds on the horizon
photo by Kevin, Colorado Clouds Blog

Here we are again! A Friday! Already!!!

Earlier this week I was in a little Facebook chat bubble with one of my local EndoWarriors, Heidi. Heidi has been a HUGE part of my life since we came together and she’s a very active member of our Bloomin’ Uterus San Diego support network. She also hosts supoprt group meetings and events at her house, finds time to run our Instagram account, and is such a strong source of strength and encouragement to our Sisters! Thanks Heidi! FOR EVERYTHING!

I’ve been relishing the mostly pain-free life since my November surgery. And every little tiny prick of pain sends me deep into a “Oh no, is it coming back already?” thought process. The poor April ultrasound results don’t help and I’m eagerly awaiting the July follow-up ultrasound.

But, I ran to Heidi and we had a little conversation yesterday during a moment of doubt. Heidi has had some glorious results from pain management and physical therapy and I figured she may very know the fear I was feeling:

Text conversation with Heidi.  Me: "Do you almost fear all the shit just coming back and rendering you incapable gain?  I do." Heidi: "Oh man, yes hunny!  Every twinge of back pain makes me think it's coming back again.  It's this stormy cloud just over the horizon that's taunting me. I'm so grateful for where I'm at & I just have to remember how hard I fought to be here, & try to enjoy each moment.  We got this, & we're beasts."

See? SUPPORTIVE! Heidi is amazing. And, she’s right: WE GOT THIS AND WE’RE BEASTS!

But yesterday’s moment has led to today’s quote search. It captures the fear I have. It gives it a visual that many people can relate to; a fear that gnaws at the fiber of their being. I suffer from a painful chronic illness, and although I’m in a wonderful position right now, I still have these fears:

“That’s the point. This healthy-feeling time now just feels like a tease. Like I’m in this holding pattern, flying in smooth circles within sight of the airport, in super-comfortable first class. But I can’t enjoy the in-flight movie or free chocolate chip cookies because I know that before the airport is able to make room for us, the plane is going to run out of fuel, and we’re going to crash-land into a fiery, agonizing death.” 
― Jessica Verdi, My Life After Now

Okay, so it might be a little dramatic…but it really captured how I feel about this relentless disease. Endometriosis.

I have my Sisters, my Warriors, my Family to get me through these moments. I’ll enjoy the in-flight movie and complimentary cookies. I’ve embraced having my nights and weekends back to enjoy. And maybe…just maybe…I can acknowledge these fears when they bubble to the surface and let them go.

May we all be able to do such a thing.

Love, Lisa

PS – Heidi, I love you so very, very, very much.

Documentary: Stronger Than Endo

White words on black background: Stronger than endo

My good friend Exxes Hauffen owns Compass Media Productions. One day he asked me, “What’s all this uterus business about?” – regarding all of my Facebook posts. So, I told him about Endometriosis and his next question was, “How can I help?”

Thus the beginnings of “Stronger Than Endo.”

A few local San Diegan Endo Sisters volunteered to share their stories and struggles. Exxes focused more on the emotional and quality-of-life aspects of the illness, rather than the physical symptoms that we are already so aware of.

We also interviewed my gynecologist and Endometriosis excision surgeon, Dr. Mel Kurtulus, of San Diego Women’s Health.

What you watch today is the end result of months of hard work. I am honored by the voice Exxes has granted us.

Exxes, thank you for your endless hours of dedication, for the passion that burned so brightly within you during the interviews, your hunger for knowledge, and your undying desire to bring awareness to this disease.

To Dr. Kurtulus, thank you for dedicating an afternoon of your time to this project, for your endless compassion and drive to give each EndoSister a greater chance at normalcy, and for giving me my life back. Your passion is evident every time I see you. And your “approachableness” is one of my favorite qualities you possess. You’re incredible; not just as a physician, but as a human being.

To Heidi, Merritt, and Zeiddy, I will never be able to thank you Brave Warriors enough. Not only for opening up your hearts to the world but for your ongoing support and love you have for other EndoSisters, even while you endure your own Battles.

This is truly a labor of love. Exxes filmed, edited, and produced this documentary free of charge. Dr. Kurtulus was not compensated for his time. And neither were myself or the interviewed EndoSisters. We hope that you enjoy, embrace, and share this video.

Without further ado, I give you “Stronger Than Endo”:

The full interviews with each EndoSister and Dr. Kurtulus will be made available shortly and shared separately.

And Exxes isn’t done yet. He’d like to continue interviewing EndoSisters and sharing our Journeys.


A note: The views and opinions expressed in this video are purely that: opinions. We understand that there are several theories as to the cause of Endometriosis, as well as the treatments. No one theory is correct. And we honor all opinions.

Bloomin’ Uterus on Instagram!

IGBU

Well, it’s done!  One of our local EndoSisters from San Diego impressed upon me the importance and outreach Instagram could offer.  But, I myself an sooo not savvy when it comes to technology or these *new* *hip* sites…so, I’ve been resisting.

Luckily, this same Sister, Heidi, graciously offered to set up a Bloomin’ Uterus Instagram account and post on behalf of our group.

If you have an Instagram account and want to connect, please feel free to check out www.instagram.com/bloominuterus or @bloominuterus.

Thank you, Heidi, for all of your help!!!  You’re amazing.  And I *heart* you.